Hallelujah is Our Song

We are the Easter people and Hallelujah is our song.

-St. Pope John Paul II-

Christ is risen, Hallelujah!

I have been so blessed this Holy Week and Easter. Now that I'm living elsewhere because of school, I am happy to find myself close to two different parishes that offer the traditional Mass. Every Sunday that I go, I find myself falling more and more in love with this beautifully reverent, timeless Mass. And this Easter, particularly the Vigil... was wonderful beyond words.

I joined our choir to prepare some polyphony for Holy Week. Nothing makes me feel like I'm flying more than singing four-part sacred music with a talented choir. It's the most iridescent feeling, the most angelic sound. I am certain that heaven must sound like it.

I thought I'd share the sequence from Easter Sunday. It's just such a beautiful text.

Christians! to the Paschal Victim offer your thankful praises.

The Lamb the sheep redeemeth: Christ, who only is sinless, reconcileth sinners to the Father.

Death and life have contended in that conflict stupendous: the Prince of Life, who died, deathless reigneth.

Speak, Mary, declaring what thou sawest wayfaring.

"The tomb of Christ who now liveth: and likewise the glory of the Risen.

Bright Angels attesting, the shroud and napkin resting.

Yea, Christ my hope is arisen: to Galilee He goeth before you."

We know that Christ is risen, henceforth ever living: Have mercy, Victor King, pardon given.

Amen. Alleluia.

it's been a while.

Hello there friends. It's been a while. I've missed this space.

I can't believe it's already the beginning of April. It's been quite the year. I'm already nearing exam season, coming to the end of my first year in nursing school.

I'm so happy to finally be in nursing - I've dreamed of this for so long. It's been beyond cool to learn all of the things I've been learning. I like knowing new things. It's almost like I can feel my mind expanding. Also, I'm no health freak, but all of a sudden I have this incredible over-arching awareness of all things related to health. "Health" having more of an broad definition than I ever would have imagined before. I'm in love with the idea of nursing from a Christian perspective - I am so blessed to be able to study in a Christian university for my program. What other nursing program allows their anatomy & physiology prof to talk during lab about moral issues such as abortion and euthanasia? I'm also so grateful to have the relationships I do have with my profs. My nursing profs in particular are so wonderful - they're like second moms to most of the nursing students here.

I can't wait to be a full-fledged nurse, but the thought of that also scares me sometimes. There's so much more to learn - I've barely scratched the surface this year. I guess I've just got to keep plodding along, doing my best. I have a feeling my next three years are going to fly by just as this last one did. Yet another terrifying thought.

Anyway, I just wanted to check in. Let you know I'm still kicking around. I think there might be a couple of posts coming along soon... a few thoughts have been percolating in my mind lately.

Love,
Sarah

Freedom & Fun

I went for a hike with two Catholic friends the other day. We laughed a lot and had a great time. At one point, one of them remarked, "It's great being Catholic because we always have the most fun." I couldn't help but agree.

This got me thinking. Why is this? Why is it that Catholics always seem to have the most fun?

I think it's because we try to stay steadfast to true freedom. What does it mean to be free? Well, Saint JPII once put it splendidly in his message to the UN (1995): 

"Freedom is the measure of man's dignity and greatness. Living the freedom sought by individuals and peoples is a great challenge to man's spiritual growth and to the moral vitality of nations. The basic question which we must all face today is the responsible use of freedom, in both its personal and social dimensions. Our reflection must turn then to the question of the moral structure of freedom, which is the inner architecture of the culture of freedom. 

Freedom is not simply the absence of tyranny or oppression. Nor is freedom a licence to do whatever we like. Freedom has an inner "logic" which distinguishes it and ennobles it: freedom is ordered to the truth, and is fulfilled in man's quest for truth and in man's living in the truth. Detached from the truth about the human person, freedom deteriorates into license in the lives of individuals, and, in political life, it becomes the caprice of the most powerful and the arrogance of power. Far from being a limitation upon freedom or a threat to it, reference to the truth about the human person — a truth universally knowable through the moral law written on the hearts of all — is, in fact, the guarantor of freedom's future."

When freedom is used responsibly, when it is ordered to truth and logic, one is happy. Adhering to this kind of true freedom that we are called to is difficult, for our secular society's definition of freedom can be quite different. Their freedom has limitations, and its expressions of fun can therefore be short lived. Many would scoff at me for saying that practicing Catholics have more fun than most, because we believe in sin and have to follow all those "strict rules." No, we aren't supposed to get wasted, sleep around, do whatever we want, but this is because participating in these actions ends up taking away our freedom: we become slaves to our disordered habits. Therefore, true freedom of self comes not from doing what we want, but remaining steadfast to goodness; only in goodness and truth will we be happy. If Catholics follow their calling to lead better lives, to follow the freedom of truth, then they will be awash with God's grace. And through this grace, they will experience a happiness beyond anything they can hope for.

Because of this, when happy Catholics get together with like-minded people, they know how to have true, pure FUN.

Image via Pinterest

(P.S. I do know that all Catholics, including myself, can fall to habits and vices which can put a damper on their fun. Generally, though, I think it's safe to say that Catholics who are striving to follow the teachings of the Church as well as those people outside the visible Church who try to follow their consciences and natural law, are able to have authentic fun and happiness!)

May Musings

FEELING BLESSED...

Because... I got into nursing!!! I had actually been waitlisted for this upcoming fall, but just found out that a spot opened up for me. I've been walking (dancing?) on air the past few days. Nursing has been my dream for years, and it is finally becoming reality. God is so good. SO wonderfully good.

ENJOYING...

This beautiful spring weather.  I am done with winter. I've been going on many walks with my dog lately - the sunshine and abundance of flowers are glorious.

READING...

Finally! It's been so long since I've had the time to read like I do at the moment. I've just begun Edmund Campion by Evelyn Waugh. I'm also re-reading Anne of Green Gables. I find that every so often I get this desire to read L.M. Montgomery. Her books are just so... comforting.

DISCOVERING...

So many new things. I've met such interesting people the past few months and they've all made a profound impact on me, all in different ways. I seem to go through this dramatic change every so often, where my view of the world just changes... for the better, usually. And I just begin to see things in a new, different light. It's quite amazing actually. (I'll say it again - God is good.)

THANKFUL FOR...

My family. I'm realizing I only have so many more months left at home before I move into dorms, and I want to cherish this time we're having together. It's also the last summer my sister will be living at home (...see below!)
Also, I'm feeling truly thankful for this gap year I've been taking. I was quite hesitant to do it at first, but it really has been a wonderful year of growth.

EXCITED FOR...

My sister's wedding! Yes, my older sister, my only sibling, is engaged!!! I am so incredibly excited for her and her fiance. They will be married this December.

Spring Colour

Winter Robin Redbreast

Clouded with snow

The cold winds blow,

And shrill on leafless bough

The robin with its burning breast
Alone sings now.

- Walter de la Mare -

Confessions of a Bibliophile

Bibliophile - n. a lover of books; one who loves to read, admire, and collect books.

"She reads books as one would breathe air, to fill up and live." Annie Dillard

I get wonderful books to read every year on Christmas and on my birthday. Last month I was given a wonderful assortment of G.K. Chesterton, Evelyn Waugh, and George Macdonald. Tenderly I placed them on the to-read stack on my bookshelf. I treat all my books, especially the newest additions to my collection, with love and care. There's something special about adding a newly obtained book to my shelf, and then standing back and admiring how good it looks there. Admiring my bookshelf is one of my guilty pleasures, to be honest.

I am especially proud of the top section of my bookshelf, which houses all of which I call my beautiful books. They really are beautiful. They're the second hand, gorgeously bound, heavenly smelling, beautifully written, old classic books that I am in love with. Some of them, such as ones by Dickens, I have a hard time getting through so I haven't actually fully read them... but they sit there anyways because they're so nice to look at.

I have a matching collection of seven Jane Austen novels I love. I bought them all for literally $2.65. Yes, you read that right. I had been studying in the little library of an island where my Oma owns a cabin, and there was a woman there getting the place ready for a book sale. She said I was free to look around even though the sale hadn't started yet. I found the Austen set, and was saddened to see I only had $2.65 in change on me. The kind lady took pity on me and said I could have the set for this amount, for the book sale was by donation, anyway. Happily (and a little guiltily) I skipped off with these beautiful seven books in my arms. They now sit on display on a piece of driftwood I screwed to the wall - it makes a neat wall decoration, I think.

I currently have a job as a library page, which in almost every way is boring, except for the fact that my knowledge of authors and titles has grown substantially, not to mention I get to take home free books to keep. This is because I get first dibs on all of the old library books and donations that the library is selling, and as part of staff, there are special privileges such as not having to pay for these books. I don't know if this is actually a thing, but a librarian gave me permission and said that all the staff does it, so I'm just going with it. So yes, my job (which usually consists of just shelving books) is very boring, but I absolutely love it because of the free books!

One of my favourite bookstores is one that happens to be just down the road from me. Owned by a retired man, he has set up his old garage into the most wonderful little space crammed full of used books. He sits there with his feet up on his desk, spectacles on the end of his nose, and piles of books teetering around his head, with the classical radio station playing softly in the background. (I hope you just pictured that in your head, because it is a wonderful scene). He used to price books at $1-3 a book, but has now raised his prices to $2-4. I'm not complaining, they're still great deals. I tend to avoid going here, though, because I always end up with so many books that he has to give me a box to carry them in.

However, it's because of these wonderful old bookstores and the privileges of my job that I have a bit of a problem on my hands. I take home far more books than I possibly have time to read. And I am completely out of room on my bookshelf. I don't know what I'm going to do.

If you're curious... here is my reading list for the next twenty books I plan on reading (not necessarily in order, and also not including various religious books which I always try to have on the go).

That Hideous Strength - C.S. Lewis
The Abolition of Man - C.S. Lewis
Crusade of Tears - C.D. Baker
The Further Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - A.C. Doyle
Gone With the Wind - Margaret Mitchell
The Dearest and the Best - Leslie Thomas
The Freedom of Jenny - Julie Burtinshaw
The Scarlet Letter - N. Hawthorne
Some Sunny Day - Annie Groves
Emma - Jane Austen
Helena - Evelyn Waugh
Edmund Campion - Evelyn Waugh
The Secret Garden - F. H. Burnett
Manalive - G.K. Chesterton
The Innocence of Father Brown - G.K. Chesterton
The Man Who Was Thursday - G.K. Chesterton
The Book of Negroes - Lawrence Hill
The Host - Stephenie Meyer
A Walk to Remember - Nicholas Sparks
Frankenstein - Mary Shelley

happiness

It's been a wonderful Christmas and New Years. Absolutely, insanely busy - but still wonderful. Full of laughs and dancing, friends and family, toasts and good food. I'm ready to sit back and reflect back on my past year, to discern where I grew and where I fell; somewhere in a beautiful place of nature where all is quiet except for the calls of birds and soft sounds of the wind through trees. Rosary in hand, I will pray that I will continue along my personal path to God, a path I hope to continue treading along for this new year and forever after.

I am completely and utterly happy right now. Perhaps it's the sunshine. Perhaps it's God's grace flooding my soul. Perhaps a little of both? All I know is - today is a wonderful day. God is good.

I haven't felt such happiness in a while. I have been happy, but I haven't been this happy. I am a prism flying in a sunny room, iridescent colours shimmering and reaching even the darkest corners. An effortless, vibrant happiness.

I'm finding it hard to describe this in words... I so desperately want to share with you all how good life is right now. Because life is indeed good. I pray that if, reading this, you are having trouble relating to my words, you will eventually be able to. All of us have ups and downs in our lives and faith journeys. Making it through these difficult valleys is what strengthens us to climb even further up the mountains. Even if it doesn't seem like it now, life will get better. Just hold on. Christ will bless you for your faith. 

A blessed Christmas and a happy New Year to all you lovely people!

November Musings // and a new name

After months of trying to come up with an original new title for my blog, I've given up and have decided to revert back to the title of my first debut into the blogging world, from quite a few years ago: Knots of Thoughts. More and more lately I've been using this space to write on just that - my knots of thoughts. Writing has always been a form of therapy for me. It's a way of sorting out my jumbled mind into something more clear and coherent, and also a way of releasing those emotions that can sometimes get too intense for me to handle. This is why I have a personal diary. Sometimes, though, I feel the need to share these thoughts and emotions, which is why I also have this blog. And I don't only like to share my thoughts - I also love sharing little snippets of this beautiful life and world we live in, whether it's through photography or other little mementos of existence. I do not have many readers, but I do appreciate the few ones I have. Many thanks to you, dear readers, for your comments, your own wonderful blogs, and your friendship.

Now that I've announced this change, here is some of what I've been up to...

ENJOYING

This wonderful time of year. That glorious feeling when you step outside on a sunny day, being able to soak up that vitamin d, and yet still having to bundle up with boots and a scarf because of the oncoming winter chill.

READING

Ice Road by Gillian Slovo

An interesting novel, and full of Russian history that I admit I'm finding difficult to distinguish and keep track of. It is a good read however.

PLAYING

A bit of Grieg. I'm working on memorizing Notturno, op. 54, no.4. "Notturno" means "nightpiece," and my favourite thing about this work is that it brings you right into its setting. When I play it, I can actually hear the stillness of nighttime, the sounds of nature, and nocturnal animals at work.

LISTENING

To more podcasts. I'm finding it a great use of my time while driving or doing chores like raking leaves (the entirety of one side of our property is lined with maple trees, so you can imagine the amount of leaves there are to rake up...)

PONDERING

Something that was brought up in a Catholic Answers podcast I listened to recently. Which is greater: to love, or to be loved? Not disregarding the importance of the other, but the answer is that it is greater to be loved, for God loves us insurmountably. What a comfort that is. To know that you are always loved. Always cared for. No matter what you do.

Starving for Wisdom

Wisdom, understanding, counsel, knowledge, fortitude, piety, fear of the Lord. The seven gifts of the Holy Spirit. Lacking in some causes an imbalance in others. Today, it is easy to become obsessed with knowledge and information. To discover the secrets of the universe, to uncover the depths of biology, to keep pushing the limits of science to see how far we can go. All are admirable goals; to have a sense of awe and wonder for our world is a very good thing. But if we become so obsessed with finding answers and obtaining all the information our brains can hold, there sometimes is no room left for other gifts, particularly of wisdom.  In our world, the gift of wisdom is one often overlooked. The danger is that our minds will start to drown in information, our souls left starving for wisdom. Wisdom is something that we all want, I think. But we don't always know to ask for it. It is so easy to become swept up in the moment and in the passion of discovery, with the consequences of dealing with unwise choices. One may have all the knowledge of the world, but without wisdom, one cannot know how to use this knowledge for the good of humanity.

Photo from Pinterest

Thoughts on Beauty & Art

Pictures taken at the Montreal Gallery of Fine Arts

Earlier this year I went to visit Montreal, Quebec. One day, while walking the cobblestone streets, I passed by a large, grotesque statue of a naked man - if it could be called a man. He had strange-looking, broken wings. There was a rectangular hole that went right through his torso, and out of this hole came what looked like tangled vines and a pair of grasping hands. The statue had no distinguishable face - it was simply a mass of human hands.

Looking at this statue revolted me, and made me think about how much art has changed in the past century - particularly in the past few decades. It's almost as if the entire purpose of art has flipped around. It's purpose used to be for pursuit of beauty, which reflected the truth and goodness of God and his created world. Especially in earlier centuries, it was often used to depict stories centering around the Christian faith - whether they were depictions of stories from Scripture, of saints, or of otherworldly places such as Heaven. Of course, there were also more disturbing paintings and sculptures made which depicted subjects such as visions of Hell or demonic images. The purpose of these grotesque subjects, however, was to alert people to the reality of evil which is, ultimately, a good thing. Much of the uglier art of today certainly does not have this purpose - rather, it seems to be for the enjoyment of, and the attraction to, the darker side of life.

While in Montreal, I also went to visit the city's fine arts museum. It held many wonderful galleries of art. One of my favorite exhibits was the Renaissance exhibit where a lot of Italian work was on display, as well as the Golden Age exhibits showing work from The Romantic, Baroque and Classical periods. We then came to the gallery of contemporary art. Almost immediately upon entering the room, my head started hurting. The wall in front of me was filled with massive canvasses of so much color my eyes watered from looking at it. One canvas, stretching almost the entire length of the floor to the ceiling, was entirely neon orange, with a black dot directly in the center. Another work was simply even, bold stripes of color in no recognizable pattern. In the middle of the room sat strangely-shaped furniture, sporting the same bold colors of the surrounding paintings. It was almost as if I was in the tackiest room of IKEA, except worse.

What has happened? What has art become? In our age, new ideas are encouraged - we are prodded to think outside of the boxes, to push past artistic boundaries. And this can be a good thing. But the problem is that we have lost our ideals. We have lost our concepts of beauty and truth. Today, the purpose to create art has changed. Today, its seems as though we create art for the sole purpose of being disturbing, to do everything in our power to not make something beautiful - but in a way that hides this fact by writing the word "creativity” in front of it.

I do not mean to condemn all modern art. In fact, there is some modern art that I like very much. But for the most part, our post-Christian culture no longer believes that the depiction and pursuit of truth, beauty and goodness should be vital to our artistic expressions, as was believed in former times. So the question is, can Christian artists today again take up the challenge to serve God by creating works that are truly beautiful? A great Catholic contemporary artist, Michael O'Brien, is a shining example of this kind of artist. From a letter O'Brien addressed to his fellow artists came the following prophetic words, words I wish all modern artists would heed: “Beware the current schools of criticism and norms in fiction and the other arts. Please don’t bow to them, don’t succumb to their rationale, which would bend and reshape your beautiful gift according to their subjective criteria and their blurred motives. Don’t become a victim of this colossal peer pressure. Don’t become a tool in the hands of the state, or the academy, or an art-guru, or any other dimension of the social revolution that is presently afflicting Western civilization.”

On Vulnerability

I was sitting amidst the crowd, and yet still apart. For a long while I stayed there, silently watching the group of people surrounding me, people deep in conversation and bonding through it. Though all coming from diverse backgrounds, they all had one main commonality in the faith they shared. Connections were being made, lives were blending, hearts were mending. These people, I realized, are a truly beautiful community. How wonderful it was for us all to be able to come together in unity. And what a sight for me to watch: the laughs, the tears, the stories, the hearts being poured out. It was the perfect example of the trust we put in each other when sharing the deeper bits of ourselves.

To find people we can connect with, to share our inner longings, and to be passionately zealous about our faith with others is an beautiful gift, and something so important to hold on to. It's incredible, really, to watch people bond and relate with one another.

It's something I've always had trouble with. To share myself, to let others peek into the dusty corners of my soul and mind – corners I allow few to touch but God and myself. Even then, I can still be shy. But this shyness – which has it's place, for I believe everyone should be guarded to a certain extent – can be my downfall. I have been coming to the realization lately that it's okay to let my guard down once in a while. I can turn back those dusty corners, and I can let the sunlight in.

Bit by bit, I'm learning. I'm learning that it's okay to be vulnerable. Because that's what it means to be human. It's how we live, heal, and create friendships with one other: by sharing the deeper, more vulnerable, and most beautiful parts of our souls.

Frames of summer // random thoughts

I.  I changed a few things up here, as I'm sure you've noticed. Some more changes in design will be coming, when I have some time to work on them... I'm also contemplating a new blog title, and any ideas are greatly appreciated! (Yes, I know I just did this earlier in the year but I'm already getting tired of my current name).

II.  I am feeling so overjoyed about the canonization of Mother Teresa. She was one incredible, beautiful soul and will forever be one of my greatest role models. Saint Mother Teresa of Calcutta, pray for us.

III.  Also, just a moment of recognition for Scott Hahn: I've been reading a couple of his books this summer. His words have been incredibly helpful for me and have made me want to continue learning as much as I possibly can about my faith. There is so much to be discovered, so much to be read, and I am absolutely thrilled by this. The more I learn, the more I love...

IV.  One more thing: an excerpt from the Velveteen Rabbit, a favourite childhood book of mine. I recently rediscovered it, and this is just too wonderful a quote not to share:

“Real isn't how you are made,' said the Skin Horse. 'It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.' 

'Does it hurt?' asked the Rabbit.  

'Sometimes,' said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. 'When you are Real you don't mind being hurt.' 

'Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,' he asked, 'or bit by bit?'  

'It doesn't happen all at once,' said the Skin Horse. 'You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand.”

August Musings

Busy, busy, busy. I always think my summer is going to be slow and relaxing, and that I'll be hanging out with friends and spending time at the little things I love, but that just never seems to be the case. Especially this summer. This has been the first where I've been working full time. Most of the time I'm helping at a small private ESL school, and once a week I'm a page at my local library. I enjoy working at both, but it is really hard to get up at 6:30 every morning. Almost painfully hard. But I really shouldn't be complaining, I'm so blessed to have these two wonderful jobs. As to the time that I am not working, here is some of what I've been up to...

HARVESTING

Dozens of buckets and bags full of our yard's apples and blackberries. We have so many this year that we can't even pick them all! Friends, family, come on over and help yourselves!

CREATING

Or rather, thinking of creating... I just bought a new mixed-media sketchbook, and I hope to spend more time on my weekends sketching and painting in it.

RELYING

So much on coffee. I have one cup every morning, maybe a bit more if I'm feeling particularly tired. It's my fuel for the day, and I have this terrible feeling that I'm becoming addicted...

DISCOVERING

That even though it's difficult for me to be working 9 hours a day, I like the steady schedule. I feel productive and motivated when I work this hard, and it is a good feeling.

READING

ABC Murders by Agatha Christie. I'm not entirely sure whether I like to read mystery stories or not - Agatha Christie's books are so good and so agonizingly suspenseful that I can't decide if the torture they put me through is truly worth it!

BEING
So beautifully content. Despite my complaints of being busy, I am actually having a truly wonderful summer, and am finding myself more and more content in life and in Him.

Be Joyful in the Good

 “Something I constantly notice is that unembarrassed joy has become rarer. Joy today is increasingly saddled with moral and ideological burdens, so to speak. When someone rejoices, he is afraid of offending against solidarity with the many people who suffer. I don't have any right to rejoice, people think, in a world where there is so much misery, so much injustice.

I can understand that. There is a moral attitude at work here. But this attitude is nonetheless wrong. The loss of joy does not make the world better - and, conversely, refusing joy for the sake of suffering does not help those who suffer. The contrary is true. The world needs people who discover the good, who rejoice in it and thereby derive the impetus and courage to do good. Joy, then, does not break with solidarity. When it is the right kind of joy, when it is not egotistic, when it comes from the perception of the good, then it wants to communicate itself, and it gets passed on. In this connection, it always strikes me that in the poor neighborhoods of, say, South America, one sees many more laughing happy people than among us. Obviously, despite all their misery, they still have the perception of the good to which they cling and in which they can find encouragement and strength.

In this sense we have a new need for that primordial trust which ultimately only faith can give. That the world is basically good, that God is there and is good. That it is good to live and to be a human being. This results, then, in the courage to rejoice, which in turn becomes commitment to making sure that other people, too, can rejoice and receive good news.”

― Pope Emeritus Benedict XVI

A Dangerous World

I just finished reading The Screwtape Letters, and so lately I've been thinking a lot about the struggle of the human will between good and evil. As Screwtape writes in one of his letters, God has created a truly "dangerous world" - a world in which "moral issues really come to the point.”

Screwtape is right, for God did make the world dangerous when he gave us free will. Free will allows us to fully appreciate God's goodness through a choice, but we can also make the choice to go in the opposite direction and walk away from Him. Each of us has been given the ability to make decisions that will affect our souls for eternity - and this can be a terrifying thing to ponder. But isn't it this very danger that makes goodness itself beautiful? For how can we fully appreciate goodness without the existence of evil? How can we see beauty without there being ugliness? How can we recognize light without darkness? There are endless examples of this intriguing truth. Our ability to discern and make choices may be dangerous, but it is this very danger that makes the reality of life all the more beautiful.

June Musings

OUTSIDE

Lilacs and roses are blooming everywhere, and their sweet scent blows in the wind. Our own garden looks like a picture at the moment, and bouquets of the flowers picked from it fill every room of the house. 

READING
The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis. I am thoroughly enjoying the book – it is quite entertaining and full of wisdom.

PLAYING
Lots and lots of Bach. His pieces are so satisfying to play, and I'm discovering them to be a great alternative of warming up the fingers to the boring, repetitive scales I've been playing for years.

LISTENING
To what I'm sure will be my Summer-go-to playlist. I've been slowly adding my favourite tunes to it over the past month or two, and I rather like it. It contains a lot of music by The Lumineers, Vance Joy, Kodaline, Hozier, Birdy, etc...

DISCOVERING
That I'm happiest on a strict schedule. I've always known this, but it hasn't been until this past year that I've been very good at following one. With a schedule, I get my work done, I have more time to spend on hobbies and other things, and I'm just plain happier in general. It also applies to my sleeping habits – I always do best with going to bed at 10:30 and getting up at 7:30. It's so easy to stay up too late, and I don't like sleeping in, so my days end up being very slow because I'm feeling tired and sluggish. Lately I've been triumphing over this struggle, and I am so much happier and relaxed because of it.

TRAVELLING 
From Montreal! My parents had to go there for work-related reasons, so I got to come along just for the fun of it. It was a pretty amazing week, despite having to work on my studies at the same time. Some of my highlights were visiting the incredible cathedrals that looked like they belonged in Europe, walking down the romantic cobblestoned streets of Old Montreal, and visiting St. Joseph's Oratory, founded by St. Brother Andre (patron of Canada).

STUDYING
(and almost getting fed up with) my chemistry course. It gets a little exhausting after you've done a couple hundred multiple choice questions in preparation for the final exam. But I have to do well in it if I am to fulfill my aspirations of becoming a nurse one day!

EATING
Lots of chef salads, full of good things like colourful veggies, boiled eggs, ham, and cheese. I've also been blending lots of smoothies. It has been so hot outside lately, and these foods are perfect for this weather.

Saint Joseph's Oratory, Montreal

Creativity: A Lost Art?

I made an account on Pinterest about four years ago. Since then, my pins have slowly accumulated to a few thousand, a number I am almost embarrassed of. I have to say, though, that I am in love with the site. There are millions of amazing ideas on there. Most of what I pin consists of crafts and art ideas, writing prompts, hairstyles, clothes, and Catholic-related things. Through my "Apparel"  board, my sense of style has changed over the past few years, and I would say that it has definitely improved for the better. I've also discovered many inspiring Catholic writers and saints whose quotes I've pinned just because I loved them so much. And my art and crafts boards certainly have aided in motivating me to spend more time creating.

But when it comes down to it, can we really claim that Pinterest is fueling our creativity? Before the age of Pinterest (and google, in general), people's creative ideas came from all over the place. Sitting on the bus, they'd pass a lonely-looking old man hobbling down the street, and suddenly find that this old man inspired them to write a poem. Or they'd bump into a friend wearing a shawl, and they'd make a mental note to find out how to crochet something similar themselves. Or they're just sitting down and having tea in the living room, when they're struck by what a lovely still-life pencil sketch the flowers and coasters on the coffee table would make.

I'm sure that these random bursts of creative inspiration still come into the heads of Pinterest-users, and they still do for me, as well - but I don't think I can deny that I often have the urge to copy someone else's work that I find online. For example, maybe I feel like going outside to sketch the trees - but first I'd probably run a search on pinterest to look at another's use of shading techniques before I do so. Perhaps I wouldn't even end up going outside at all - I might just stay at my desk, ideas flowing from my computer screen. We can certainly learn from others, but I think that the danger that can come from copying another's work is that, if it's done too much, we will lose our own unique touch and personal style.

I think that most of us who use Pinterest regularly have to admit that it is somewhat of an addiction. Not all addictions are necessarily bad - I just believe that Pinterest, as well as all other forms of social media, must be used in moderation. Personally, something which I enjoy, and which I don't find anything particularly wrong with, is scrolling down my Pinterest feed near the end of my day. My work is finished, I'm feeling quite tired, and I just want to spend a few moments doing something pleasurable while drinking my herbal tea. In this context, I think my use of Pinterest is justified. But if I am wasting my time by just scrolling through pictures of cute puppies, or being on there when I should be doing something else, I hope I'd be able to recognize this as a mindless use of my time, and close my laptop right away.

So I guess my question is, in the long run, is the use of Pinterest contributing to the development of our creativity, or not so much?

Dusk

We went for a walk through a marsh at dusk last night. It was beautiful. Birds were singing, the sun was setting over distant hills, and the honey-like scent of cottonwood and wild roses lingered in the air.

I've always felt so in awe of those magical moments in time that seem like incredible gifts coming directly from God. They're as if He's stretching out his hand, letting us peek in and gasp in amazement as this magnificent aura seeps out and overwhelms us with its beauty. The marsh last night was like this. Unfortunately my camera does not bode well in low light, so very few of the pictures taken are worth sharing...

May Musings

Life has been plodding along in a rather satisfactory and steady manner lately. Thankfully April didn't decide to live up to its name as far as weather goes - it has been quite lovely outside this past month. A little while ago I cleared out my closet, pulled out my Summer clothes, and have been enjoying being able to go outside with just a light summery dress on. 

READING

Just Send Me Word by Orlando Figgs.

A fascinating novel and true story about love and survival in the Russian Gulag.

PLAYING

A far bit of Domenico Scarlatti.

I am not too familiar with his music, but lately I've quite enjoyed sight-reading his sonatas.

THINKING

About what my summer will be like ... it will be quite the contrast from last year's summer since I will be working full time. 

I do hope I will have time to spend on art, though, something of which I've been neglecting lately.

COOKING

The most delicious red wine and garlic mushrooms sautèed in a pan. Recipe here.

GARDENING

My annual potted herbs that I harvest for tea. I love my little garden - I have four varieties of mint, lemon verbena, lemon balm, lavender, and a few more. I find gardening to be such a soothing hobby and it is so nice to have something to take care of and check up on every day.

DREAMING

About writing a novel. Dozens of ideas for a plot and characters have been popping into my head lately.

I've wanted to write a novel since I was a little girl, but it's just a matter of enough time to do it...

WALKING

Down to the beach almost every day. I hope I will always be able to live next to the ocean - it's basically been my back yard for as long as I can remember, and I just can't imagine it not being so.