Confessions of a Bibliophile

Bibliophile - n. a lover of books; one who loves to read, admire, and collect books.

"She reads books as one would breathe air, to fill up and live." Annie Dillard

I get wonderful books to read every year on Christmas and on my birthday. Last month I was given a wonderful assortment of G.K. Chesterton, Evelyn Waugh, and George Macdonald. Tenderly I placed them on the to-read stack on my bookshelf. I treat all my books, especially the newest additions to my collection, with love and care. There's something special about adding a newly obtained book to my shelf, and then standing back and admiring how good it looks there. Admiring my bookshelf is one of my guilty pleasures, to be honest.

I am especially proud of the top section of my bookshelf, which houses all of which I call my beautiful books. They really are beautiful. They're the second hand, gorgeously bound, heavenly smelling, beautifully written, old classic books that I am in love with. Some of them, such as ones by Dickens, I have a hard time getting through so I haven't actually fully read them... but they sit there anyways because they're so nice to look at.

I have a matching collection of seven Jane Austen novels I love. I bought them all for literally $2.65. Yes, you read that right. I had been studying in the little library of an island where my Oma owns a cabin, and there was a woman there getting the place ready for a book sale. She said I was free to look around even though the sale hadn't started yet. I found the Austen set, and was saddened to see I only had $2.65 in change on me. The kind lady took pity on me and said I could have the set for this amount, for the book sale was by donation, anyway. Happily (and a little guiltily) I skipped off with these beautiful seven books in my arms. They now sit on display on a piece of driftwood I screwed to the wall - it makes a neat wall decoration, I think.

I currently have a job as a library page, which in almost every way is boring, except for the fact that my knowledge of authors and titles has grown substantially, not to mention I get to take home free books to keep. This is because I get first dibs on all of the old library books and donations that the library is selling, and as part of staff, there are special privileges such as not having to pay for these books. I don't know if this is actually a thing, but a librarian gave me permission and said that all the staff does it, so I'm just going with it. So yes, my job (which usually consists of just shelving books) is very boring, but I absolutely love it because of the free books!

One of my favourite bookstores is one that happens to be just down the road from me. Owned by a retired man, he has set up his old garage into the most wonderful little space crammed full of used books. He sits there with his feet up on his desk, spectacles on the end of his nose, and piles of books teetering around his head, with the classical radio station playing softly in the background. (I hope you just pictured that in your head, because it is a wonderful scene). He used to price books at $1-3 a book, but has now raised his prices to $2-4. I'm not complaining, they're still great deals. I tend to avoid going here, though, because I always end up with so many books that he has to give me a box to carry them in.

However, it's because of these wonderful old bookstores and the privileges of my job that I have a bit of a problem on my hands. I take home far more books than I possibly have time to read. And I am completely out of room on my bookshelf. I don't know what I'm going to do.

If you're curious... here is my reading list for the next twenty books I plan on reading (not necessarily in order, and also not including various religious books which I always try to have on the go).

That Hideous Strength - C.S. Lewis
The Abolition of Man - C.S. Lewis
Crusade of Tears - C.D. Baker
The Further Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - A.C. Doyle
Gone With the Wind - Margaret Mitchell
The Dearest and the Best - Leslie Thomas
The Freedom of Jenny - Julie Burtinshaw
The Scarlet Letter - N. Hawthorne
Some Sunny Day - Annie Groves
Emma - Jane Austen
Helena - Evelyn Waugh
Edmund Campion - Evelyn Waugh
The Secret Garden - F. H. Burnett
Manalive - G.K. Chesterton
The Innocence of Father Brown - G.K. Chesterton
The Man Who Was Thursday - G.K. Chesterton
The Book of Negroes - Lawrence Hill
The Host - Stephenie Meyer
A Walk to Remember - Nicholas Sparks
Frankenstein - Mary Shelley

happiness

It's been a wonderful Christmas and New Years. Absolutely, insanely busy - but still wonderful. Full of laughs and dancing, friends and family, toasts and good food. I'm ready to sit back and reflect back on my past year, to discern where I grew and where I fell; somewhere in a beautiful place of nature where all is quiet except for the calls of birds and soft sounds of the wind through trees. Rosary in hand, I will pray that I will continue along my personal path to God, a path I hope to continue treading along for this new year and forever after.

I am completely and utterly happy right now. Perhaps it's the sunshine. Perhaps it's God's grace flooding my soul. Perhaps a little of both? All I know is - today is a wonderful day. God is good.

I haven't felt such happiness in a while. I have been happy, but I haven't been this happy. I am a prism flying in a sunny room, iridescent colours shimmering and reaching even the darkest corners. An effortless, vibrant happiness.

I'm finding it hard to describe this in words... I so desperately want to share with you all how good life is right now. Because life is indeed good. I pray that if, reading this, you are having trouble relating to my words, you will eventually be able to. All of us have ups and downs in our lives and faith journeys. Making it through these difficult valleys is what strengthens us to climb even further up the mountains. Even if it doesn't seem like it now, life will get better. Just hold on. Christ will bless you for your faith. 

A blessed Christmas and a happy New Year to all you lovely people!

November Musings // and a new name

After months of trying to come up with an original new title for my blog, I've given up and have decided to revert back to the title of my first debut into the blogging world, from quite a few years ago: Knots of Thoughts. More and more lately I've been using this space to write on just that - my knots of thoughts. Writing has always been a form of therapy for me. It's a way of sorting out my jumbled mind into something more clear and coherent, and also a way of releasing those emotions that can sometimes get too intense for me to handle. This is why I have a personal diary. Sometimes, though, I feel the need to share these thoughts and emotions, which is why I also have this blog. And I don't only like to share my thoughts - I also love sharing little snippets of this beautiful life and world we live in, whether it's through photography or other little mementos of existence. I do not have many readers, but I do appreciate the few ones I have. Many thanks to you, dear readers, for your comments, your own wonderful blogs, and your friendship.

Now that I've announced this change, here is some of what I've been up to...

ENJOYING

This wonderful time of year. That glorious feeling when you step outside on a sunny day, being able to soak up that vitamin d, and yet still having to bundle up with boots and a scarf because of the oncoming winter chill.

READING

Ice Road by Gillian Slovo

An interesting novel, and full of Russian history that I admit I'm finding difficult to distinguish and keep track of. It is a good read however.

PLAYING

A bit of Grieg. I'm working on memorizing Notturno, op. 54, no.4. "Notturno" means "nightpiece," and my favourite thing about this work is that it brings you right into its setting. When I play it, I can actually hear the stillness of nighttime, the sounds of nature, and nocturnal animals at work.

LISTENING

To more podcasts. I'm finding it a great use of my time while driving or doing chores like raking leaves (the entirety of one side of our property is lined with maple trees, so you can imagine the amount of leaves there are to rake up...)

PONDERING

Something that was brought up in a Catholic Answers podcast I listened to recently. Which is greater: to love, or to be loved? Not disregarding the importance of the other, but the answer is that it is greater to be loved, for God loves us insurmountably. What a comfort that is. To know that you are always loved. Always cared for. No matter what you do.